The Message version of 1 John 3:19-20 talks about ‘debilitating self-criticism,’ that nagging feeling many of us have that we are not fulfilling God’s commandments properly. Over-sensitive hearts can carry heavy loads of condemnation around with them which God never intended them to bear. Other people’s opinions (like Martha’s decisive view that Mary ought to be helping her in the kitchen!) influence us; the Accuser nags us incessantly (rather like the Roman delator, a paid informer who would gladly bring public accusations against people in return for payment!) False guilt can cripple us and stop us from living in the freedom Christ has purchased for us.
John’s advice in this letter gives us reassurance and a strategy for dealing with false guilt. Here’s my paraphrase of this passage (with reference back to other parts of this letter.) As one who regularly carries an unnecessary load of false guilt and pain, I find John’s advice utterly invaluable.
“You know, little ones, it’s not enough to just say we love people. We have to show people our love through our actions. We have to be truthful in love. That’s the way we practically show we belong to the truth, that we live in God’s reality and not our own. And it’s the way we shut our hearts up when they nag us, never satisfied with anything we do for God. Ever feel like that? Never satisfied? Never confident? Never at rest? Always condemned? There’s always something more you could have done, isn’t there?
But you know that kind of debilitating self-criticism isn’t from God. God’s open and straightforward with us. To be sure, He’ll tell us when we get it wrong: no sugar-coating it, no pussyfooting round issues. But this endless worrying, this introspection, this self-flagellation which never brings any relief… that’s not from God! If your heart condemns you, remember it’s not the most reliable of guides! Real sin is easy to deal with. I’ve already told you how to do that: confess it to God and the blood of Jesus will wash you white as snow, wash every sin stain away. Then you’re clean and free! This pseudo-sin is just another tactic of the Accuser. He’s like an informer, going round slandering you to all and sundry, but that’s only because he’s condemned. You’re no longer condemned. God’s already seen to that, wiping all condemnation from us through His Son!
God knows everything, remember, and has made provision for every sin you could possibly commit (past, present or future!) So instead of wallowing in sin or in feelings of guilt that are just millstones from the enemy, tied around your neck with the sole purpose of dragging you down with him, cheer up! God is greater than the Accuser, greater than your accusing heart, and He’s not accusing you.
Instead, you can come before God confidently, boldly, freely, with assurance, as a child does to its father, running up with eager anticipation, asking for what it needs, never doubting his goodness, arms open wide to receive his lavish gifts. When we’re living to please Him, that pleases His heart. And pleasing God is nowhere near as complicated as we make out at times. He just wants us to believe in the name of His Son, Jesus Christ – for that way, we’re confessing Jesus is God’s chosen One, the Saviour of the world – and to love each other, just like He told us. That’s it. Not exactly onerous, is it? As we do that, living obediently, He lives in us and we live in Him, snuggled together through inseparable love. How? By His Spirit, another of His lavish gifts. We really can’t lose!”